In a recent post, Advice to the Bride to Be, I shared the only advice I had for a friend who is about to get married.
My advice was simple: Love Big. In the comments section of that post, you the readers of this blog, proved what I have already known for a long time…that you are far more insightful than the writer of this blog.
You had advice of your own for the bride-to-be and it doesn’t seem fair to keep that advice hidden in the comments section, so here are some are some morsels of wisdom from you…
- Compromise…..and Love Big! –Frau
- I think I’d probably say something about listening, not just hearing but listening. –Liz
- Life is personal and advice doesn’t always fit. I would say respect. Give respect and expect respect. –lisleman
- Accept your partner for who and what they are – you are not going to change them anyhow. Be willing to grow and develop with them. Listen (and watch body language), think, then talk if need be.-Wayne
- I endorse plenty of love and would add laughter and a huge sense of humor.-Vidya
- When you’re in the bathroom, take a look before you sit down.-Classic NYer
- Don’t do it!! 😀 Sorry. I’ve been with my partner for 25 years now. I think my advice would be to give one another space.-L.L. Cool Joe
- I always use “may all your troubles be little ones.”-Judith
- If you want something really bad, find a way to make him think it was his idea.-Mrs. 4444
- …make sure you get the road of communication opened up early in your marriage. Talking is so important. Don’t be shy with the one you love.-Debby
- Never go to bed angry.-Eva
- The best advice I ever heard was to think of your spouse as a gift. On Christmas morning we don’t run down to open our presents only to think- I don’t like this about it, or I wish it was this, etc. So why do we start to do that to our spouse? Notice the good- the things you love and those things will grow. –Emmymom
- My advice would be that there will be times you don’t like your husband very much…and that’s totally normal!!-Tiffany
- It boils down to this: You can’t know now what life has not taught you yet. So don’t sweat the small stuff and almost everything will turn out to be small stuff looking back on your long life together. With ever argument, every trial ask yourself “Is this the memory I want to remember for the rest of my life should this be our last day together. It makes putting your spouse first and easy decision to make.-Rita Stebbing
Good stuff right?
Since I offered my original piece of advice, more advice has come to me that I would like to pass along not just to brides to be, but to everyone in general…
- Do not postpone bliss.
- In life and relationships: choose happiness.
My very last piece of advice is to watch the following video; it truly puts things into perspective. You won’t be sorry…
Hello. 🙂
Well, I am not married, engaged, nor a parent but I think this advice is just as valuable and I thank you for sharing it. I can see how one could exchange spouse for “parent” or “sibling” or “friend” and the same rule applies. I’m hoping by applying this to everyone I love that by the time I marry, I’ll have a pretty good grasp on it.
And very touching video … thanks for sharing it! I like how he pointed out that dying isn’t the scary part, it’s the regret.
Thank you for your thoughtful comment. I think this advice does apply for relationships in general.
You rock my dear. I love it all. Especially the listening one .. hehe
I love my husband. He knows exactly what to do. He makes me laugh everyday. And everyday is like a new date. My advice would be~Always adapt to the change. Don’t let change ~change you!
Together we’re quite a sage bunch! 🙂
Right?
So much great advice from everyone. Love the video, so powerful!
Great advice! I’m still laughing about this one: When you’re in the bathroom, take a look before you sit down. 🙂
Suppper maami!
Thanks for quoting my advice. I little advice typically improves the mix of life.
Amen an amen. Such an inspirational post!
And*
Oh that was a good video. “I don’t fight to be right I choose to be happy” loved that.
And so much great advice, thanks for using mine 🙂
I love all this post. It has great and simple things, funny things… I´m smiling while reading. Thanks for sharing.
listen and never go to bed angry!!
Very very nice. The first thing I read this morning was this:
“Let go of your ego’s need to be right. when you’re in the middle of an argument, ask yourself: Do I want to be right or be happy? When you choose the joyous, loving, spiritual mode, your connection to intention is strengthened” – Wayne Dyer
Wonderful compilation! The best part is – this will work for any relationship!
Mrs. 4444’s comment made me LAUGH! I’ve used that one with my boss too. 🙂 These are great. I’ll have to put them away for when I get married.
you just hit a soft spot 🙁 Thanks for the sound advice. I like Eva’s: Never go to bed angry. I recently saw a neighbor’s bedroom wall with a huge stenciled message: Kiss me Goodnight Every Night No Matter What. I loooove it. Will be biting! 🙂
TED is the greatest. I’m always surprised how much I love their speakers and this one is definitely a “keeper”. I hadn’t heard it before and thank you. This IS great advice. Thank you Mami.
And all the advice is good. I’m with Frau– COMPROMISE 🙂
xoxoxo jj
I think these suggestions should be put into a poster and plastered somewhere in the house. So many think that it’s happily every after, but the truth is that it’s work for it to be happily ever after!
I love TED videos. We often watch them first thing in the morning to set the tone for the day. This is a great one. Do you mind if I share on Zen Mama? I used to do an inspirational movie Monday Movie. This one would be just perfect! I would of course put in a link to you.
The quotes are just great!! I love when you post them. Very inspiring.
Share far and wide!
LOVE all these tips! Funny I was thinking about this a few days ago. What makes a marriage and relationship last? Why do some work and others don’t? I love the idea of thinking of our partner as a gift. And yes, choose happiness! Sharing this with my Facebook fans since it goes so well with my mission of love and relationships. Great post!
Okay, I’ll watch it.
As for my advice, I was only kidding (mostly). My most sincere answer would be to agree that if you are ever not having your needs met (for love, sex, attention, whatever), promise each other that you will TELL each other, not just go out and get it met in some other way. You owe that to each other. I hate it when people say, “I tried to tell him, but he wouldn’t hear it.” Make a pact. Communicate. Treasure your relationship enough to keep it first.
I’m finally catching up on the blog! THANK YOU ALL for the wonderful advice and words of wisdom. Thank goodness that I’ve already started looking before I sit on the toilet (or feel for it in the middle of the night)! Thank you Unknown Mami for your love and support.
Love, MoMo
Yay!