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By Claudya

Funny San Francisco Latina Blogger

October 11, 2012 Claudya Martinez

How to Piss Off Your Significant Other in 2 Easy Steps

How-to-on-chalkboard-unknownmami

I don’t consider myself an expert in many things, but there are a few areas in which I excel. One of those happens to be the alacrity with which I can piss off my husband. I’ve seen this particular method work time and time again, so if you would like to piss off your significant other quickly, just follow these two EASY steps…

  1. Nag, cajole, or otherwise induce your significant other until they clean something of your choice (i.e. the bathroom or kitchen floors).
  2. Once they start cleaning, make sure you watch them and tell them how they are doing it wrong. Feel free to use phrases like:
    “Seriously, is that how you’re going to clean that?”
    “Ugh, I’m just going to have to do it again after you’re done.”
    “If I’d known you weren’t going to do it right, I would have just done it myself.”

After that all you have to do is sit back and watch as they get enraged.

Have you ever tried this particular method?

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Filed Under: Humor, Marriage, Tutorial

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Comments

  1. Sabrina Moscon says

    October 11, 2012 at 9:44 am

    LMFAO! oh man…my husband isn’t easily pissed off as he is the most laid back dude i know, but this is classic and i WILL try it hahah. he’ll call my bluff i’m sure.

    Reply
  2. blanklisleman says

    October 11, 2012 at 9:56 am

    I’ve been on the receiving end of this.  Being supervised by your spouse is seldom welcomed IMHO.  Even a disguised suggestion on how to do whatever is rarely accepted by me.  Do you think there exists some cleaning gene tied to those special female genes.

    Reply
  3. blankDanielleTodd says

    October 11, 2012 at 10:15 am

    Ha! If I accuse my husband of being cranky, it totally sets him off. If I ever want to pick a fight, it’s the first button I push.

    I’ve given up on nagging and cajolingto get him to clean up. I’ve also tried passive aggression. Lately, I’ve been trying the silent martyr approach, which isn’t really working either.

    As for #2 – I’m often on the receiving end of this one in our house. My husband is notorious for giving me unsolicited advice without actually lifting a finger.  

    Reply
  4. blankEva Gallant says

    October 11, 2012 at 12:28 pm

    By accident, more than once!

    Reply
  5. blankdeborahpucci says

    October 11, 2012 at 12:55 pm

    Oh yes I have definitely tried this method!

    Reply
  6. blankmissliz says

    October 11, 2012 at 5:11 pm

    My husband got the cleaning gene…not me. I can still piss him off, though, whenever I leave the breakfast dishes all day and then ask him to help do the dinner dishes!

    Reply
  7. blankAngelia Sims says

    October 11, 2012 at 7:00 pm

    Well, not quite like that. Lol! But, I do manage to get him to scrub the tubs and showers. I really hate that job and refuse to do it.

    Reply
  8. blankKimberly says

    October 11, 2012 at 8:58 pm

    Ha ha ha!  I don’t have a cleaning bone in my body.  I’d say, “well then you do it!”  And go iron…I like to iron. 🙂 

    Reply
  9. blankVidya Sury says

    October 11, 2012 at 9:30 pm

    hahaha – no, I haven’t. And wouldn’t either. Note I didn’t say anything about not thinking it though. And legally, intent is just as bad 😀

    Reply
  10. blankKathy says

    October 12, 2012 at 5:16 am

    guilty…oh so guilty! 

    Reply
  11. blankLinda Wilson says

    October 12, 2012 at 5:55 am

    Oh, Mami – yes I have, but I also have a much more simple way….

    I exist – that’s enough 0:)

    L

    ps – how do I get my pic to show without taking up half your bandwidth everytime?

    Reply
  12. blankChris H says

    October 12, 2012 at 7:32 pm

    OMG I have done that!!!  To the kids too… and yep… it sure does work fast to piss them off.

    Reply
  13. blank::xishell:: says

    October 12, 2012 at 8:52 pm

    Haha!  I can vouch for this technique 😀

    Reply
  14. blankClassic NYer says

    October 17, 2012 at 7:53 pm

    I prefer the similar but more understated route of taking his finger in hand and running it along the side of the dishes I’ve just cajoled him into washing so that he can feel for himself how greasy they still are.

    Reply
  15. blankanonymous says

    June 30, 2013 at 6:41 am

    this is the studipidiest thing i could do just to try to piss him off because he’s much expert at that! Infact he’ll find some ways to piss me off through this….

    Reply
  16. blankJake says

    May 28, 2017 at 4:36 am

    I’ve been flipping through your blog from this week’s post. I can certainly identify with pissing off my husband like that!

    Reply

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blankWelcome, I am your host Claudya Martinez. I'm a bilingual Latina raising multicultural kids in San Francisco. WARNING: I have a sense of humor that I'm not afraid to use. Hang out, stay un poco and let's get to know each other. Read More…

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