I have issues with my body, specifically with my weight. Boring, right? Everybody has issues with their weight. I know. I hate being so predictable. I don’t like to talk about it; it makes for boring conversation.
I’ll tell you what I don’t have issues with no matter what my weight is: my ass. It’s true, I love my ass. I love it when I’m thin and I love it when I’m heavy. I’m not bragging or trying to say that my ass is better than anyone else’s; it’s just the one part of my body that’s a’ight.
When I find myself in situations where I feel less than (this happens a lot because I’m an actor), I sing myself a little song by the artist currently known as Prince that makes me feel “a’ight”. It goes like this:
“Sexy motherfucker shakin’ that ass,
shaking that ass.
You sexy motherfucker.”
And if there is no one around, you better believe I stand up and start shakin’ my ass. It’s such a happy joy-infused anthem that makes me feel confident and powerful.
Oh and if I need a little extra boost, I shake my tush to the classic “Baby Got Back” by Sir Mix-A-Lot.
“I like big butts and I can not lie
You other brothers can’t deny
That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waste
And a round thing in your face
You get sprung”
Crass, but music to my ears.