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By Claudya

Funny San Francisco Latina Blogger

April 5, 2011 Claudya Martinez

I think…

I think all instructions are purposely written to confuse me.

I think my toddler needs to quit being so honest and observant (I already knew my tooth was crooked, thank you very much).

I think the seat belt in my car has been designed to uncomfortably crush my bountiful bosom and chafe my neck.

I think my husband secretly enjoys torturing me with farts that peel the paint off walls.

I think my a$$ makes these pants look too small, but in a good way.

What do you think?

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Salud!
Fragmented Fridays

Comments

  1. Dazeedreamer says

    April 5, 2011 at 1:18 pm

    Ha. I’m totally with you on the seatbelt thing. I hate the neck burn I constantly get from it.

    Reply
  2. Jeanie says

    April 5, 2011 at 1:31 pm

    I think you are probably exactly right on all counts. Well, they probably didn’t design the seat belts with your bosom in mind, but the results are the same.

    Reply
  3. blankAnonymous says

    April 5, 2011 at 1:38 pm

    The seat belt on the driver side is comfy, not on the passenger side though. My saggy boobs don’t get in the way though. The strap hurts my neck.

    Reply
  4. blankHilary says

    April 5, 2011 at 2:04 pm

    I think you’re a hoot! 🙂

    Reply
  5. blankMommyLisa says

    April 5, 2011 at 2:26 pm

    I LOVE the last one….work it!

    Reply
  6. blankClassic NYer says

    April 5, 2011 at 2:45 pm

    I think I agree about your a$$… but in a good way. 😉 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ya7Vzc_Wnv0

    Reply
    • blanklisleman says

      April 5, 2011 at 4:48 pm

      your selection reminded me of this song – enjoy
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eB5EE42So7I

      Reply
  7. blankSuziCate says

    April 5, 2011 at 2:54 pm

    Somtimes the honesty of toddlers nearly kills me…if you want to know the truth, don’t even ask, just enter the presence of a small talking child!

    Reply
  8. blankAnonymous says

    April 5, 2011 at 3:40 pm

    I think you’re probably right about his farts. I do that, but don’t tell my wife.

    Reply
  9. blankEva Gallant says

    April 5, 2011 at 4:42 pm

    I think the fart torturing thing is a male trait. My husband has been known to do the same!

    Reply
  10. blanklisleman says

    April 5, 2011 at 4:46 pm

    It can take a long time to create those noxious fumes (not that it’s hard work). Maybe there is some internal artistry to it.

    Reply
  11. blankMiMi says

    April 5, 2011 at 5:25 pm

    Hahaha! Your ass makes the pants look too small!! Mine does too. 🙂

    Reply
  12. blankTina says

    April 5, 2011 at 7:17 pm

    I think I can agree with just about everything here. And I think I need martini right now.
    As for observant tots. Last night, mine ran up to my stomach in front of his whole class, patted my I’m-not-pregnant belly and said “Mama, I love your belly. It’s soft and squishy and makes good zerberts.”
    Swell.
    Best,
    Tina

    Reply
  13. blankCyndy DysFUNctional Mom says

    April 5, 2011 at 7:32 pm

    I think you are right on all counts.
    I think if my husband doesn’t stop throwing his dirty laundry around, I”m going to refuse to wash it. And maybe even hide it from him.

    Reply
  14. blankShelly Shuey says

    April 5, 2011 at 2:41 pm

    I think my kids are annoying today.

    Reply
  15. blankrebecca says

    April 5, 2011 at 11:16 pm

    I think my husband can be a mean, insensitive jerk sometimes.

    Reply
  16. blankKIM LONG says

    April 5, 2011 at 4:34 pm

    Love the seatbelt one! I think I need a vacation! lol

    Reply
  17. blankjules says

    April 5, 2011 at 11:37 pm

    I think….I feel the same way about these things.

    Reply
  18. blankSandra says

    April 6, 2011 at 12:04 am

    I think our pants are in kahoots!
    And I think you’re hilarious. So glad my kids are old enough to know better than to point out that I would have benefitted from braces.

    Reply
  19. blankMichelle Shellabarger says

    April 6, 2011 at 2:52 am

    LOVE. IT.

    Reply
  20. blankhttp://cutand-dry.blogspot.com says

    April 6, 2011 at 5:22 am

    The one about your a$$…priceless!!
    I think this made me literally LOL!

    Betty xx

    Reply
  21. blankAnonymous says

    April 6, 2011 at 10:23 am

    I think you are beautiful.

    Reply
  22. blankAnonymous says

    April 6, 2011 at 11:52 am

    I think your right except for the a$$ part and tooth I would never talk trash about you! I think you could kick my a$$! Why do men think farting is funny or cute or okay without warning.

    Reply
  23. blankAnonymous says

    April 7, 2011 at 1:05 am

    The pants are grateful – I am sure!
    And instructions anymore are such a joke. The translations are deplorable.

    Reply
  24. blankAnonymous says

    April 7, 2011 at 1:19 am

    I think I just had a great laugh!!

    Reply
  25. blankJoanna Jenkins says

    April 7, 2011 at 3:25 am

    I think you crack me up!
    Thanks for the smiles.
    xo jj

    Reply
  26. blankMyya says

    April 7, 2011 at 4:13 am

    I think you are hilarious. I also think you hit every single one of those observations right on the head. I do believe I have made the same ones!

    Reply
  27. blankHelen McGinn says

    April 7, 2011 at 11:05 am

    Hullo there, lovely lady, with a new baby an’all! Can’t believe what I’ve missed. Congratulations (on the new baby, not the bad a$$ pants and farting). xxx

    Reply
  28. blankChris H says

    April 8, 2011 at 12:53 am

    LOL… I think you are hilarious!

    Reply
  29. blankbetty says

    April 8, 2011 at 5:03 am

    I’m with you about the instructions! I think I’m a bit smart, but when I open up an instruction booklet it definitely looks Greek to me!

    betty

    Reply

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blankWelcome, I am your host Claudya Martinez. I'm a bilingual Latina raising multicultural kids in San Francisco. WARNING: I have a sense of humor that I'm not afraid to use. Hang out, stay un poco and let's get to know each other. Read More…

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