Looking in the mirror is something I do every day and usually, it’s no big deal: I take a look, I see myself, sometimes I’m tired, sometimes I look good, I do what I do, and then I step away and go on with my life. But then there are the days when I look in the mirror and this self-hate takes ahold and criticizes every single thing I see: my freckles turn into sun spots, my smile lines are nothing but wrinkles, my curly hair looks unruly and frizzy, and jokes that I’ve heard about Mexican women having mustaches seem to have been inspired by me, and I curse the mirror and I curse myself.
I had one such run in with a vanity mirror in the car the other day. I was sitting there waiting for my husband while he shopped and our youngest was asleep in her car seat. Out of boredom or a deep desire to piss myself off, I pulled down the car’s sun visor and opened the mirror and what I saw made me scowl until I noticed the scowl, shook my head, and said to myself, “Mirrors are not for picking yourself apart.” Then I shut the mirror and let it go and let myself be.
I know I’m not the only one that does this and I know there are others who do it more often. I wanted to write about it to remind myself and to remind others that mirrors are not for picking yourself apart. If you need the reminder on a regular basis, go ahead and print out the “mirror” PDF file I created and paste it somewhere near your mirror and when you hear your thoughts turning into criticisms of what you see in the mirror, look at the image and remind yourself that mirrors are not meant for picking yourself apart.
Awesome! I love it! Makes me think of how I literally covered my bathroom mirror with a towel for over a month after I had my son. I know…crazy. I just couldn’t handle it. If I could just focus on what I like about my body and the joy I feel from what I can do with it, then I think my “flaws” would feel smaller.
Best,
TIna
You are not alone and your thoughts a right on…“Mirrors are not for picking yourself apart.”
“…deep desire to piss myself off…” see we do share common thoughts. The mirrors don’t bother me much (it’s the cameras). Most of them are not long enough to check for matching socks. Sometimes I see my dad in the mirror which brings a weird but warm feeling. I suggest a slight change to your wording “Mirrors are not for picking your nose or yourself apart.” Good reflective post.
So true!! If I study my reflection, there is always something to dislike. I try to avoid doing that. If I catch myself, I then lecture myself “hey, you were supposed to be checking for stuff stuck in your teeth, goofy!”
Good point. Perhaps I’ll avoid mirrors altogether!
Thanks for the reminder! I work out and when I see positive results, I STILL pick and think, “I wish this could be better…” Sigh.
So true.
nice. I just might print it and hang it in the middle school bathroom.
That’s a beautiful printable, Claudya. I have fond memories of my Mom and I desperately looking for a large oval mirror. We never found one we liked. Sigh.
Great message!
But how am I supposed to pick myself apart if I cant do it while looking in a mirror???